Saturday, May 24, 2008

Script from Thom

Note: The artwork for the comic should be very heavy in a "film noir" attitude. Heavy shadows, possibly even black and white.

PAGE ONE

It's 1921 in the city of Chicago. The Eighteenth Amendment prohibiting the sale of alcohol has been passed for two years and organized crime is becoming more and more entrenched. A light rain has started, with signs of getting even worse.

It is here in the interior of a small general store that our story begins. Mr. Rothman, a middle aged Jewish man (as well as proprietor of the store) is standing on a small ladder, putting away some canned goods behind his counter. The bell attached above the door chimes, signaling someone coming in. We never see who comes in.

ROTHMAN

Be right with you.

He turns to look at the customer.

ROTHMAN

Oy. You vere just in here! Vhy can't you leave me alone!

Rothman's face turns worried, then panicky.

ROTHMAN

No! I promise I'll get you the money!

A large shot echoes as if from a shotgun blast. The camera tilts downward past the counter, showing the body of Rothman, his head completely obscured by the shadows. Rivulets of blood can be seen coming from the shadows, though.

PAGE TWO:

it is later in the day. The rain is now coming down in a torrent. Visibility is poor, so any shots in the distance should be partially obscured by the rain.

We have a medium wide shot of a dark figure (Joe Murphy, our lead character, wearing a fedora and trenchcoat) -- standing in an alley looking at Vic's Diner. Even though the rain is pouring outside, the alley is dry, protected from the tall (two or three story) buildings on either side.

A close-up of Joe's hands shows him holding his pistol -- a 1905 S&W Hand Ejector .38 (http://world.guns.ru/handguns/sw-he38.jpg) -- left hand on the pistol grip and cradling it in his right.

He puts his gun back in its shoulder harness before walking across the street.

Switch to a view inside the diner, medium shot of Bridget as we see Murphy walking to the diner. (Note: The buildings that made up the alley are comprised of a grocery story and a bar.) The diner is mostly empty right now. There are a young (20's) couple sitting in one booth holding hands. Another booth has the busboy (Chen Cheng, the young Chinese boy) packing up dirty dishes, and a third booth has the person obscured by the newspaper he's reading (with several plates in front of him, with half-eaten food on it. Bridget is pouring a cup of coffee to someone at the counter. -- use several shots to establish this, each one has Murphy getting closer and closer to the door.

As Murphy walks in the door, Bridget looks up at him. His face is obscured by his fedora. As Murphy walks past each of the booths, the occupants look up at him until he reaches the newspaper reader. The front page blares out "BALLPLAYER MURDERED!" in large type, with the smaller headline under it reading "'TRIPLE A' ADAMS GUNNED DOWN AT HOME" (Note: 'Triple A' Adams is referring to Alphonse Abraham Adams, a fictitious pitcher for the Chicago Cubs.)

PAGE THREE:

Our newspaper reader lowers the paper to look at Murphy (his face finally visible for the first time. It's his partner, Larry Carey. To call Carey a "fat slob" is an understatement. His mouth is stained with the remnants of the blueberry pie he was eating and his shirt is covered with the scraps of food that didn't quite reach his mouth.

CAREY

You gonna sit down or jjust gonna stand there all wet?

Carey begins laughing

CAREY

What am I sayin'? You're always all wet!

Murphy is taking off his coat and hat, neatly folding it up in the seat before sitting down.

MURPHY

Funny, Larry. You're a regular Jimmy Durante.

Has the Captain given us an assignment yet?

With Murphy sitting down, Bridget has brought over a cup and is pouring him some hot steaming coffee.

CAREY (Shoving some more pie into his face)

Y'know, Joe, maybe if you weren't such a bluenose, the Captain'd like ya more.

BRIDGET

The usual, Detective Murphy?

MURPHY

Thank you, Bridget. That'd be jake.

CAREY

And some more of this delicious pie, doll!

Carey smacks Bridget on the bum. (He's a creep... )

A loud scream penetrates the diner.

PAGE FOUR:

Splash page: With Murphy, Carey, and Bridget framing the shot, we focus through the window over to the grocery store. An older (mid-50's) middle-class woman is standing in the rain (no coat), obviously panicked and frightened.

Story title and credits will be placed around the bottom of the page.

SCREAMING WOMAN

(LARGE type with jagged voice balloon)

HE'S DEAD!

Quick Character Reference

MAIN

Bridget Pauline O'Connor -- waitress/detective

Joseph "Joe" Murphy -- detective/cop

COPS

Lawrence "Larry" Carey -- Joe's crooked partner

-- Murphy's captain

James and John "The Tweedles" -- identical twin cops

DINER

Vic -- the Cook

Chen Cheng -- Chinese busboy

-- waitress

CHICAGO

Mayor William Thompson